“Just don’t think about it!”
Anyone who has had any form of anxiety or depression can probably tell you that they’ve been told that before, in regards to dealing with negative thoughts and feelings. If I had a dollar for every time I’ve been told that, well…I wouldn’t be rich, but I’d most certainly have money!
It’s often the go-to for people who don’t really understand. They act as though it’s easy to not think about negative things – while totally discounting the fact that it’s often not something that we consciously do. People don’t sit at home and think, “hmm, I’m bored, I’m going to think about these things that upset me!”
Okay, some people might, but those who do are likely ill in an entirely different manner.
Many things can cause negative thoughts. Those with PTSD, for example, will have negative thoughts relating to their trauma. Sometimes all it takes is the smell of something, or a noise, to transport their mind back to whatever happened in their past. It’s not something that’s done on purpose. As someone who actually does have PTSD, I can honestly say that I wish I didn’t remember anything, because that would be so much simpler. Something minor can take you back to that place, and the negative thoughts that are associated with that.
Sometimes negative thoughts are a result of paranoia, or fear. Hearing a strange noise at night may make someone think that their house is going to be robbed. A strange man staring at a woman may make her think that he is a criminal and is going to try and force himself on her. Every day we’re told on the news about crime and the state of the world, wars, illness. And as a result, we become paranoid, scared. We fear and doubt what we don’t know, what may lurk in the darkness. And that causes negativity.
Over-analysing a situation can cause negativity, because you find yourself wondering, fearing, doubting everything you come across. Think of a child doing an exam. They didn’t know the answer to one question, and so they start over-thinking about the exam on the whole. They start to believe that they will have failed, even though it was only one question they had an issue with. Their mind becomes filled with negativity as a result – they’ve likely failed, they’re a terrible student, they’re stupid.
Those are just a few examples of what causes someone to have negative thoughts, but there’s a great deal of other things that could cause it. Self-anger, criticism, low self esteem, fear of the future, fear of the unknown…you get my drift. It’s not something that’s done on purpose, though, and, more often than not, one negative thought leads to another. And another. And another, until it becomes a black hole, a never-ending pit you have to consciously drag yourself out of.
But the question is, what can be done to stop the negative thoughts?
In my experience, what works for one person doesn’t work for another. Some find themselves feeling refreshed after having a cold shower, to reset their ‘brain’. Some use their senses to anchor themselves – the smell of flowers, for example, or the feel of the grass under their bare feet. There’s no one ‘cure’ that will work for everyone, because everyone is different.
So, what works for me?
Why, a good old cup of tea!
I did some research into this, for this post. Tea is rich in antioxidants that can help reduce inflammation and increase brain brain function. Those who drink tea may find themselves at a lower risk of having a heart attack or strokes. Herbal teas can help soothe the digestive system. Though the study into the health benefits of drinking tea is ongoing, it’s widely believed that drinking tea can help soothe the nervous system and reduce stress.
I didn’t start drinking tea for that reason, though. It wasn’t really something that I consciously started to do. I’ve been a coffee drinker for several years, since my late teens, and my hot drink of choice when I was younger was always hot chocolate. And then I had a very bad flu one year, about ten years ago. I’d lost my voice, and smell of coffee made me nauseated. So, needing something, my father made me lemon tea, with a slice of real lemon, and honey in it.
I had that every night while sick, and found myself enjoying it. I had always loved the taste of lemon, so the lemon tea was both soothing on my throat and delicious. After that, it was like something had changed in my taste buds. I still loved coffee, but tea was soothing, comforting in a different way. What started for me as something to drink when sick became something I started to use when I felt stressed or overly anxious. Especially lemon tea. It’s still, to this day, my favourite – though peppermint is a close second. The scent alone is enough to make me feel calmer, to reset my brain and drag me from the black hole that is negative thoughts and stress.
While there’s no conclusive proof that tea helps mental health, you cannot deny there is no better comfort than a mug of hot tea, especially on a cold, wet day. It may not be everyone’s solution to rid oneself of negativity, but it most certainly works for me.
The humble cup of tea, with the power to quiet the mind and soothe the soul.
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